T minus four days.

The past couple of weeks have been uneventful chaos. oxymoron? perhaps. Either way, the reality has set in. Today was my last day at the Eagle. :( I work the floorset this weekend, but it was my last real customer helping shift. I'm going to miss most of those people.

The responses to us leaving are varied. Most people are really excited for us and some are jealous. Some are looking at us as immature girls with reckless ambition. Some think it's smart to take this adventure. ome think it's dumb. I don't care what anyone thinks. I think all of those could apply. Yes, it's crazy and unplanned and scary. But it is also the most exciting thing I've ever done in my life and one of the few instances I truly feel alive. There has been so much planning, but so much lack of planning. I love it. I think this is the best way to do this. No strings, no ties, to time frames. It's kind of like a friend with benefits situation. The outline is covered, but all the details are fuzzy and blurred and not quite figured out, because that road hasn't been traveled yet.

I talked to my cousin Jamie today. When she was my age, she moved to California for three years. She gave me a lot of advice: what to look for, where to look to live, jobs, etc. I liked hearing her point of view. A young girl who did the same thing we are about to do. She was excited for me. That meant a lot.

I left Orlando today. I said goodbye to one of my best friends for at least a few months. Then I cried the whole way to work because of it. Those roads are so familiar. The faces and places. The names and flow. As much as I hate Orlando, I built my life there. My grown up life. That's where I feel like I became a grown up. I took on responsibilities there. I changed, I matured, and I lived. The city itself had become part of who I am. Now I'm leaving. For another adventure, another chapter nonetheless, but I still feel as if the ties were cut too harshly. Too quick. In my head, I tried to disconnect myself months ago. I thought it was working. It wasn't. I did it today though...

I keep thinking, what if something happens and we change our minds last minute? What then? I'm almost anticipating it, not because I want it to, just because it doesn't seem real to face the unknown. But here we are. It's Wednesday night and we leave Sunday morning. In four days time, I will not be living in Florida anymore. That sounds delightful...